Review 2

Proverbs 18:22. I want to continue our series on marriages made in heaven but lived on earth. And right now what we're doing is we're kind of finishing up the series and going back and reviewing. This has been a long series and and these are important truths for both our marriage relationships whether you are in marriage or going to be married later or wherever you're at in that relationship or but it's also important for personal relationships and our relationship within the church because the marriage is a picture of Christ in the church. And so as you look at Proverbs chapter 18 verse number 22 the Bible says who so findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtain a favor of the Lord.

And so I want to talk about I want to just go back and look at three of the couples we've looked at in this series and and and look at what we learned from their lives to kind of remind us of that. And the first one is Noah and Mrs. Noah. Turn over to Genesis chapter 6. Uh the very first book of the Bible, Genesis chapter 6. And of course, we all know who Noah is. And he's well known in the scriptures and even outside of Christian circles. But uh we don't know what Mrs. Noah's name is. We don't have her first name. In Genesis chapter 6 and:es 8 and n the Bible says, "But Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord."

These are generations of Noah. Noah was a just man and perfect in his generations. And Noah walked with God. And then verse number 18, but with thee will I establish my covenant. Thou shalt uh come into the ark. Thou and thy sons and thy wife and thy sons wives with thee. Now, we do know from later on the chapter, we know Noah's sons and we know their names. We know the wife's names, but we don't know Noah's wife's name. And uh she is mentioned five times and we're never told her name. Uh and she's not even mentioned 10 until 10 verses after the rest of her family. And uh you know, two of the hard things about being a wife sometimes is number one, uh when a woman gets married, she of she loses her identity.

uh often she'll take her husband's last name and even if she doesn't take her last name, the wife kind of is uh is brought into the husband's family and she kind of loses her identity and and of course the idea of submitting to her husband as well and that's difficult and a challenge for many women. In Ephesians 5:es 22 and 23, the Bible says, "Wives submit themselves yourselves unto your own husbands as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church and is the savior of the body." And and so that's the challenge that women have to face. Men have their own challenges of taking on the responsibility of leadership and all this involved with that.

But you know what I think is interesting here in Genesis chapter 6 and verse 8, it says, "But Noah found grace in the eyes of the Lord." And as we think about that phrase, I I I I think about how did how do you find grace? How do you find grace? In Ephesians chapter 2, verses 8 and n the Bible says, "For by grace are you saved through faith, that not of yourselves since the gift of God, not of works, lest any man should boast." So how do you find grace? Through faith. Now, you can find things in different ways. Sometimes you can find something by an accident. Have Have you ever found money on the road or on the path or somewhere when you were walking along and found some money and and maybe somebody drops a $20 bill and and all of a sudden uh you find that $20 bill there and so uh Zeke found a $20 bill that somebody dropped.

I won't name who dropped it, Zeke, but uh uh he found that $20 bill. And uh and sometimes we can find something by accident. in Proverbs chapter 3 and verse number six is in all thy ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths. You know, and God can bring you even if it seems by accident into finding his grace. Sometimes it's like uh we had one person that found a track in their windshield and it was put in there and and got kind of shoved down his side. It was there for uh they didn't find it till 3 months later after a lot of rain and storms and everything else. It was all worn out. Uh but when they found it, they said that's when we needed it.

and and they found that track and came to church and got saved. Uh there's another couple that were looking for another church. Uh they were supposed to go visit a church and they were driving around, couldn't find the church, and drove by our our church and we had somebody out there by the driveway waving people in and directing them where to park and they saw him out there. He looked so excited and said, "Well, why don't we just go to church there?" And they found our church by accident. And um we had somebody else that said, "You know, we were out going somewhere and we took a wrong turn and we passed by.

your people out there sign waving and we saw that and decided to go to your church and and so sometimes you can find grace by by accident or sometimes you can find it by looking for it. Uh this morning before the service I hid a $20 bill underneath somebody's chairs right under the front middle of your chair so everybody can look there so someone's chairs got a $20 there here and downstairs too. You got one downstairs as well. Uh feel under your chair because if you don't uh if you don't look there you may not find it. It'll be right there in the middle if you feel it there. All right. Uh so looking at that and this front row right back here, it's on one of your seats there.

So if you're not, check the one next to you if it's empty and see if it's that one, too. All right. Uh and downstairs is somewhere on the right side over there. But you can find it because you got to look for it. If you didn't look, you're not going to find it. In Matthew 13 45 and 46, it says again, "The kingdom of heaven is like unto a merchant man seeking goodly pearls, who when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it." He said, "I want those pearls." And he went out and did everything he could to find them and buy them. In Jeremiah 29 verse number 13, the Bible says, "And you shall seek me and find me when you shall search with all your heart."

Some of you got up this morning said, "Let's go to church." You came seeking to find the Lord, to find out who God is, to find out more about God in your life. Uh you came looking for him and you find grace when you look for it. You seek him and he will find you will find him if you search with all your heart. But other times you can find it because somebody gives it to you. Anybody here like to have a $20 bill? I got one more left to give away. There's also one downstairs they've got left to give away. Raise your hand if you want the $20 bill. Let's see who am I going to give it to here. I got to make that decision.

I think I'll go right back here and give it to his right here. All right. So, I'm going to give you the $20 bill. There you go. All right. Now, see, you can find it because somebody brings it to you. The Bible tells us in Hebrews chapter 4 and verse 16, "Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace that we may obtain mercy and find grace and help of time of need." You see, God wants to give you grace. [snorts] God has already offered to give you grace. All you have to do is say, "I'll take it." Now, I've only have one $20 bill. I'm all out. I got none left. Uh, I don't have enough to give everybody here, but God has enough grace to give everyone here.

See, mercy is not getting what you deserve. God said he will show you both mercy and grace. Mercy is not getting what you don't what you deserve. In Romans 6:23, the Bible says, "For the wages of sin is death." You and I, because of our sin, we don't deserve to go to heaven. We have this idea that God owes me a place in heaven. That God has to let me to heaven. That if I'm just good enough, God has to give me a place. God does not owe us a place in heaven. In fact, if we go to heaven with our sin, we will ruin heaven. And because of my sin, I don't deserve to go to heaven. I deserve to go to hell.

But God in his mercy said, "You don't have to go to hell." And God in his grace said you can come to heaven and all you have to do is find grace. In Ephesians chapter 1 and verse number 7 the Bible says in whom we have redemption through his blood the forgiveness of sins according the riches of his grace. Somebody wants to find grace is this God's riches at Christ's expense. God in his grace said, "Listen, you don't deserve to go to heaven, but I love you. And I send my son to die for you upon the cross to give you eternal life so that you could come to heaven." God's riches at Christ's expense.

He died on the cross so that God could give you grace and give you a place in heaven. But you have to find that grace. See, Mo Noah found grace in the sight of God. Not because of what he did, but because God in his grace said, "Noah, I love you and I want to save you from the flood." And God wants to save you from hell and give you eternal life if you will find grace in him. You shall seek him and find him when you search him with all your heart because he's already offered to you his grace through Jesus Christ. But you know, Noah found grace. But the thing I think about Noah's wife is that she was also gracious.

She was gracious. In Proverbsap 11:16, it says, "A gracious woman retainth honor and strong men retain riches." She was a gracious woman. The Bible says in Proverbs 31:10, "Who can find a virtuous woman for her price is far above rubies?" A virtuous woman. And the word virtuous means a woman of valor, a woman of grace and strength. You know, it's interesting the it comes from the root word to be pain. A a virtuous woman is a woman who endures pain to do to be gracious to do what's right. Can can you imagine? I I know I've done this in my life and sometimes I remember one time I came in the house carrying a carburetor back when cars had a carburetor and I the carburetor going bad and I came in the house and said, "I want to rebuild the carburetor."

And I started doing on the dining room table. You ladies of imagin I know better now, but I didn't know better back then. And my wife sure had to show me a lot of grace having all that stuff from the engine spread all over her kitchen, you know. And I've done that more than once where I've come in, had this great idea, this great project, and made a mess everywhere. Can you imagine what it was like for Noah's wife when Noah came into the house and said, "Hey, honey. I I I've got a little project we're going to work on." In Genesis chapter 6 and verse number 14, the Bible says, "Make thee an ark of gopherwood.

Rooms shalt thou make in the ark and shall pitch it within and without with pitch." And then he goes on to tell him to collect all the animals and all the food for the animals. And Noah comes home and says, "Honey, we got a project to work on. Can you imagine how much grace you really need?" And and Lays, what I want to challenge you with is you need to show graciousness in your w marriage because your husband sometimes going to come in with unreasonable expectations. You come in uh asking you to do things that are hard to do and and we don't ever hear Mrs. Noah complaining. We don't ever hear griping about it.

She just got in there and did what needed to be done. You know, he said, "We're going to collect two of all the animals along with all the extra food for sacrifice." Who who do you think was the one that got to do all of that stuff? You ever had your kids come and say, "Mom, dad, mom, I I want to get a dog." And I promise you, if we get a dog, I I'll feed it. I'll take care of all the messes. I'll take it for walks. You ever heard statements like that? And who ends up feeding it, taking it for walks, and take care of all the messes? Mom. And Noah comes in and says, "We're going to get two of every animal, and we're going to get food for all those animals.

And guess who's the one gonna be taking care of all of that? You know, picking up messes after a dog is a lot different than picking up messes after an elephant, you know, and and and yet she was so gracious about that. They they were building that arcs for somewhere between 55 to 120 years, probably around 88 years or so. They were on the ark for 371 days in a crowded, smelly ark, rocking all over the place with all these animals. Colossians 3:es 12 and 13 says this. Put on therefore as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bows of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering, forbearing one another and forgiving one another.

If any man have a quarrel against any, even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. Noah found grace in the sight of God. But Noah also had a wife that understood what it meant to be gracious. And that's a lesson that every one of us in this room can learn is how to be gracious even when things are difficult and challenging. How to show grace and humbleness and mercy and all the rest of that even when things are not going so well. See, we need to do those things. And so we need to find grace. Noah was a man of faith. In Hebrewsap 11:7 it says, "By faith Noah being warned of God of things not yet seen as yet moved with fear, prepared an ark to the saving of his house by the which he condemned the world and became heir of the righteousnesses which is by faith."

See, he had to have faith in God during this whole time. And Mrs. Noah also had to learn to have that faith with him. In 1 Peter 3:es 5 and 6, it says, "For after this manner in old times, the holy women also trusted in God adorned themselves, being of subjection unto their own husbands, even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, whose daughters you are as long as you do well and are not afraid with any amazement." I want to challenge you men. Does your wife look at your life and say he has faith? You see, if you want your wife to trust you, she's got to see you trusting God. Because if she doesn't see you trusting God, how is she going to have trust in you?

And so often we we we get upset with our wives for not trusting us, but we're not giving them example of faith and trust in God. In 1 Peter chapter 3:7 the Bible says, "Likewise, ye husbands dwell with him according knowledge, giving honor to the wife as under the weaker vessel as being heirs together the grace of life that your prayers be not hindered." When it says that the wife is the weaker vessel, it does not mean that she is a lesser person. Often as a wife, you lose your identity in your marriage. You lose your identity in your husband and and you submit to him, but that doesn't mean you're the weaker vessel.

And Noah understood that in order to get this done, there's no way he could have done this without Mrs. Noah. We don't know her name, but we know that she was a woman that deserved honor. Because I am sure without a doubt that the the bulk of the work ended up on her shoulders, taking care of all those animals and taking care of her family and and taking care of Noah and all that was involved with it. Noah and his sons may have done the work on the ark, but she did much more work. and she deserved honor as well. And men, you need to honor your wives. They need to see you trusting God, but they also need to see you and you honor them for what they do in your lives as well.

We can learn some lessons from Noah and Mrs. Noah. We can also learn a lesson from Abraham and Sarah. Turn to First Peter chapter 3. 1 Peter chapter 3. Look at 1 Peter chapter 3 and:es 1-7 says, ' Likewise you wives, submit should be in subjection to your own husbands. If that if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives. While they behold your chase conversation coupled with fears, whose adorning let not be the outward adorning of plating the hair or of putting on of wearing of gold or putting on apparel, but let it be the hidden man of the heart, and that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is the sight of God of great price.

For after this manner in the old time, the holy women also who trusted in God adorned themselves, being a subjection of their own husbands, even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, whose daughters you are, as long as you do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. Likewise, your husbands dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as under the weaker vessel, and being heirs together the grace of life, that your prayers be not hindered. He used Abraham and Sarah as example of of leadership and subjection to one another. See, subjection is a is a tough subject. In 1 Peter chapter 3:6, it says again, even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling them as Lord, whose daughters you are as long as you do well and not afraid with any amazement.

It's it's tough to have to deal with that. Uh uh you know, I I when I when we we first got married, I told my wife that she could just call me by the first three letters of my last name. My name is Surface. Yeah, you didn't get it. But anyway, we often look at this idea as men, we look at this idea of our wives submitting to us is that you need to obey me and just do what you're told to do. And that's not what submission is. You see, submission is being subject one to another. In Ephesians chapter 5, turn over to me if you would. Ephesians chapter 5 and look at verses number 22 through verse number 24.

Ephesians chapter 5 and verse number 22. The Bible says, "Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church and a savior of the body. Therefore, as the search is subject unto Christ, so wives be their own husbands in everything." Now when the idea when the Bible talks about submission, it's also talking to husbands about taking leadership, not not being the dictator, not being the boss, just telling everybody what to do, but as Christ loved the church and gave himself for us, sacrificial servant leadership.

In verse number 21, it says, "Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God." You see, there's so much wrong teaching on subjection today and and and what it means. And we need to understand that the Bible talks about subjection is talking about uh the being uh responsible to one another. In Galatians 3 28 it says there's neither Jew nor Greek. There's neither bond nor free. There is neither male nor female. For all are one in Christ. And every one of us in this room whether you're a man or a woman. You are equal in Christ. And you have that equal standing in the Lord. And when God talks about subjection, he's not talking about the woman being lesser than the man.

is talking about a a working relationship and and and the idea of this word subjection in Hebrews chapter 13:1 17 the Bible says obey them that have the rule over you and submit yourselves for they watch for your souls as they that must give account that they may do it with joy and not with grief for that is unprofitable for you. That word obey is an interesting word in the Greek language. It it comes from the word where we get our word to tranquilize the idea of you know taking volume or tranquilizing somebody and the Bible says to obey it means to chill out. This doesn't have to be a stress out thing.

We need to understand that obedience is is is a mutual relationship. Now again fellas listen to me. If your wives are going to submit to you, they've got to believe that you're watching for their souls. Because it says, "Obey them that watch for your souls." And if your wife is going to submit to your leadership, she's got to believe that you are going to lead and you're going to lead your family in the right direction, that you care about their needs more than you care about your needs, that you are going to watch for their souls. In Hebrews chapter 6 and verse number N, the Bible says, "But beloved, we are persuaded of better things of you and things that accompany salvation, though we thus speak."

That this idea of being persuaded the same idea of that word obey. It's to be persuaded. Persuaded that your husband loves you and wants what's best for you and your family. Again, Ephesians 5:25, husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it to be that sacrificial servant leader. In Ephesians 5:2 it says, "And walk in love as Christ also hath loved us and hath given himself for us in offering the sacrifice to God for a sweet smelling savor." And fellas, if you want your wife to submit and to follow your leadership, then be the right kind of leader. Don't be the dictator.

Don't be the one ordering everybody else what to do. Don't be the one that tells everybody else to do this, but you don't do that. You need to be the sacrificial servant leader leading the way by your very actions. When you budget, you you're the first one to give up and and and and say, "I I don't need to buy this." When you make decisions that we have to do this, you're the first one in line to do it. You're the one that's setting that leadership example. You're the one that is is giving of of yourself to your wife and your spouse. And spouses, you also not only need to be persuaded in your husband's love for you, but you also need to be persuaded in God's love for you.

I want you to turn over to 1 Peter chapter 3 and look at verse number five. 1 Peter chapter 3 and verse number five. 1 Peter 3:5. The Bible says, "For after this manner in the old time, the holy woman also who trusted in God adorned themselves being of subjection unto their own husbands." Ladies, I know from personal experience there's times my wife could not trust me. I know there's times that I failed to be the leader that I should be. That I failed to make the sacrifices that I should have made. And I'm thankful for a wife that even during those times when she didn't see that leadership in me, that she still saw the leadership of God.

And she understood that if she would follow God's plan, that she she if she could not trust in me, that she could trust in God. In Colossians 3:18, it says, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands as it is fit in the Lord." You see, sometimes you can't trust your husband, but you can trust God. And you need to learn to trust the Lord even when you can't trust your your husband. But husbands, be the kind of husband that your wife can trust. Be the kind of husband that she knows you love her unconditionally, that knows that you have her best interests in mind. you're watching for her soul and for the soul of your family and that you are going to sacrifice be the one to give the first sacrifices and be the one that is going to to give of yourself in in servant leadership.

In 1 Corinthians 11:3 it says, "But I would have you know that the head of every man is Christ and the head of the woman is the man and the head of Christ is God." this idea of of being the headship, the idea of obedience. It it's the idea to be an order of rank. It it's like in a formation in the military, you have the officers up front uh giving the orders and you have the upper enlisted, then you have the enlisted. You have an order of rank. In first Peter chapter 3 and verse number five again, it says that that we are ordained to be in subjection under husbands in the Lord. It's the idea of trusting in God.

In Matthew 8:9 and 10 says,"For I am a man under authority, having soldiers under me. And I say to this man, "Go," and he goeth. And to another, "Come, and he cometh, and my servant, do this, and he doeth it." When Jesus heard it, he marveled and said to them that followed, "Verily, I say unto you, I have not found so great faith, know not in Israel." You know, those of you in the military understand the working relationship between an officer and the enlisted. It it it can't if if it's just kind of a the listener there or slave relationship, it's not going to work. It has to be a partnership. It has to be working together, having confidence in each other, having confidence in the leaders, and having confidence in the followers as well.

And that same thing is true in the marriage is learning to build confidence in one another, working together a as a team, submitting one to another in the fear of God as it says in Ephesians 5:21. You remember the story of Sarah and Abraham? How that at one point he told everybody to tell everybody that that he was his sister rather than his wife because he was afraid that she was so beautiful that people would kill him to take her for their wife. And and what a what a terrible thing to do. But yet Sarah still had to obey him and still followed his leadership even though he failed in so many ways.

the root word of the word reverence. It says also to reverence your husband. She had to respect him, to reverence him even though he had failed in such a spectacular way. In 1 Peter chapter 3 and verse number six, it says, "Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord." See, to reverence him, the word reverence, the root word of that word reverence is the word phobia. In Ephesians 5:33, it says, "Nevertheless, that every one of you in particular so love his wife even. on the YC that she reverence her husband to have a phobia. Now a phobia is an uncomfortable irrational and lasting fear of a certain object, situation or activity.

You have a phobia. Some people have phobias of spiders. You are you a you have phobias of spiders there? Or maybe you have a phobia of snakes. My wife had a dream last night with snakes and she uh kept asking me, "Can snakes bite you more than once?" And that's yes, they can. Or or maybe you have a phobia of heights. You one of those kind of people. You get up too high, you get really scared and really nervous and think you're going to fall off. Or maybe you have a phobia of clowns. I hope you don't have a phobia of this clown. That's me, my younger years. Uh but uh you know, a phobia is an irrational fear.

Now, let me make something clear. No woman should ever be afraid of her husband. No woman should ever be afraid of her husband. In 1 John 4:es 18 and 19, it says, "There's no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear because fear hath torment. He that fear is not made perfect in love. We love him because he first loved us." If you're the kind of husband that runs your household on fear, that your wife is afraid of how you're going to physically abuse her or emotionally abuse her or mentally abuse her, that's a terrible way to run your relationship. And that should never happen. There should not be a fear of of being hurt by your husband.

Be a fear of them hurting you emotionally, physically or mentally in any way. You need to treat your wife with honor. It in back in Ephesians, it says that or first Peter says that the the down later on verses 7, it says uh giving honor unto the wife is unto the weaker vessel. The idea of the word honor there, the weaker vessels don't break her. And listen, there are some of you husbands in this room that have broken your wife. She's just broken because you just beat her down so much. Maybe not physically, but emotionally and spiritually and mentally. You just put her down all the time and you treat her like she's stupid and dumb and she can't do anything right.

And she is just so broken. And the Bible says you are to value her, to honor her, to treat her in a way like you would a valuable vase that you don't want to break it because it's worth so much. And you need to stop breaking your wife because you need to have a trust in each other. You cannot be afraid. And this goes both ways. A wife can't be afraid of her husband and a husband can't be afraid of the wife. Sometimes husbands are afraid of their wives because their wives don't respect them because they put them down all the time like they like they have no value. They treat them in a wrong way.

The Bible says in Proverbs 31 112, the heart of her husband does safely trust in her so that she have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. See, your husband has to trust you that you are going to respect him and reverence him and treat him with respect and reverence. And when he doesn't trust you, then that makes him of less value as well. And so you have to treat your husband with respect. You say, "Well, my husband isn't always respectable." Well, you're not always lovable, but he's told to love you whether you're lovable or not. And when you can't respect your husband as a person, respect him in his position.

Treat him with respect. In Genesis chapter 17 and verse number 17, it says, "Then Abraham fell upon his face and laughed and said in his heart, hall a child be born unto him does 100 years old, and shall Sarah that is 90 years old bear." In Genesis 18:12, it says, "Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, after I am waxed old, shall I have pleasure, my Lord?" Uh, both of them laughed when God told them they're going to have a baby in their old age. Now, they didn't trust in God. It was wrong to laugh at God. Don't get me wrong there. But yet, I do think there is a place for laughter in marriage.

Later on in Genesis chapter 21 and verse number three, they named her son. What did Sarah and Abraham name their son? Does anybody know? Say it out loud. What did they What did they name him? Isaac. Do you know what Isaac is in Hebrew? Laughter. See, afterwards they got together and they realized both of them laughed at God. And that's not a good thing to do. But they did have a good laugh in naming their son. And you know what is missing in a lot of marriages is you got to learn to laugh together. Instead of laughing at each other, laugh with each other. And a lot of couples have forgotten how to laugh and how to have fun together.

Proverbs 17:22 says, "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine, but a broken spirit dryth the bones." If you haven't laughed together this week, then there's something wrong in your marriage. You need to enjoy some good inside jokes. You need to have a little bit of fun with each other. You need to kind of tickle each other's funny bones. You need to learn how to laugh together. Then the last couple is the couples that we looked at that I want to look at today is Isaac and Rebecca. In Ephesians 5:es 28 and 29 says, "So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife shall love himself.

For no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourished it and cherished it, even as the Lord the church." Men, the more you love your wife, the more you're loving yourself. Because the more love you give to her, the more she has to give back to you. And if your wife is not loving you the way you want her to, then you've got to fill or take. Listen, when you're when you run out of gas, whose fault is it? Is it the car's fault or is it your fault? It's your fault. Stupid car. It's not the stupid car. And when your wife is not loving you the way she ought to, you know, God never commands your wife to love you.

He commands you to love your wives. And if you are loving your wives, you are filling her tank with love and she's going to have more than enough to give back to you. You know, Isaac Rebecca is kind of like a hallmark love story. You remember the story how how that Abraham sent his servant to go find a wife for Isaac and Isaac had to wait this whole long time until she came back. And and the Bible talks about in Genesis chapter 24 how he was out in the field kind of looking off in the horizon hoping she'd come today and and he sees her off in the distance riding her camel. And and the Bible tells us that that uh when she and she saw Isaac.

It says when she saw Isaac, she lighted off her camel. Uh it wasn't that she was smoking cigarettes. It's that she she jumped off that candle to go run to Isaac because he's such a handsome guy. and and and and Isaac looked and said to his servants, "Who's that beautiful woman coming that way?" And and both of them react that way and and let me ask you a question, couples, when's the last time you took each other's breath away? When's the last time you looked at your wife and looked at your husband took then your breath got taken away? Because that's what happened to Isaac. To breathe after is the ver what the word means.

And I in Genesis chapter 26 and verse 8, it says that somebody saw them sporting together. You know what that means? They were flirting. They were having a little bit of fun together. You know, I uh how many of you watched the uh the final game of the baseball last night with the Dodgers and and Blue Jays? That was kind of quite a game, wasn't it? Fantastic. Some of you are sports fanatics. You need to be just as big a fanatics about your marriage. You need to get excited about your marriage. Get excited about your relationship. God designed the marriage relationship to be fun. The marriage bed is honorable and undeviled, but horong adulter God will judge.

God wants you to have times of sporting together to enjoy each other physically and emotionally and spiritually. You see, like I like I said before, don't let your sex life being like a Dallas Cowboy fan. Maybe next year. It ought to be something that's a regular part of your life to have that physical relationship. You'll get that joke later. Folks, God wants us to live happily ever after. Isaac and Rebecca started out well, but they ran into some problems later on in their marriage. They got bitter. In Colossians 3:19, it says, "Husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them." Some of you are holding on to something, some hurt at some point that your husband or your wife did to you and you're not letting it go.

And that bitterness is destroying your relationship. That's what happened to Rebecca and Isaac later in life. See, don't hold on to things. In Ephesians 4:31-32, it says, "Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice. Be kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake had forgiven you. Now, some of you may be thinking, "Well, pastor, you don't know what he did. You don't know what she did." And I don't. But if you can't let it go, often when I counsel couples, I'll ask the wife or ask the husband, "How long are you going to be mad at them?

Give me a time. How long? For a year, two years? 10 years? 20 years? How long are you going to be mad at them? See, you can hold on to that anger. You can hold on to that hurt. You can hold on to that bitterness and ruin your relationship. Or you can decide it's time to forgive. Now, that doesn't mean it's okay what they did to you. That doesn't mean you don't need counseling. You don't need to work it through and resolve that thing, whatever it was. A lot of times, the husband or wife doesn't even know what they did wrong. So, how can I fix it if I don't even know what it is you're mad at? But you can't hold on to that bitterness.

In Ephesians chapter 4:es 2 and 3, it says with all loneliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love and endeavoring to keep the spirit the unity of the spirit of in the bond of peace to have that unity comes from a trust of one another. What happened with Rebecca and Isaac? We talked about this in this message is they with their kids, they started going offside. They had favorites, one for one child, one for the other. And one of the one of them was the strict parent, one of them was the easy parent. And what they did is they got to the point they thought they had to counterbalance each other instead of compliment each other.

And I see this so often in marriages. As a husband and wife, usually when we get married, we are of opposite personalities because opposites attract, right? But what's fun to date is not always fun to mate. Being with a fun, loving guy that just has a good time all the time is not always fun. Being married to that person and they're not taking responsibility in life. Being with a girl who is very responsible and and and very obedient, you know, listens to you and does what you want is great in dating, but then when you get married, you want them to start making decisions and taking their own leadership.

And a lot of times the very things that we fell in love with are the things that now we hate about each other or we get upset about each other with. And what happens is then we begin to try to counter each other. Well, they're not they don't take things responsibly. So, I've got to be more responsible. And we end up trying to counterbalance each other and pull away from each other instead of realizing that God put us together so that we could come together and complement and work together as a team. And that's exactly what happened to Rebecca and Isaac. One of them was the disciplinarian. The other one was the easygoing parent.

And and instead of coming together to work as a team, they they kept counterbalancing each other doing the opposites and they tore their family apart and they tore their relationship apart. And that happens a lot of times because the the spender thinks this person is always saving so they they have to spend the money. This person's a saver. I have to hide the money. and you get this counterbalancing going out rather than complimenting and cooperating. So we can learn some great lessons from the Bible and from the couples in the Bible. These lessons can be applied in our marriage and they can be applied in our Christian life in other areas as well.

And I hope you'll apply them today. Let's bow for prayer. Every head bowed and every eye closed. The most important lesson is the lesson of faith. Define grace. Have you found grace? By for by grace are you saved through faith that not of yourselves is a gift of God, not of works. Let's say amen. You boast. Have you found the grace of God? Do you know if you died the day that you go to heaven? Do you know that your sins are forgiven? If you know that for sure without a doubt in your heart, your mind, raise your hand right now and hold it just moment. I know I have found grace. I know I'm going to heaven.

All right. Thank you. You put your hands down. There was some that could not raise your hand. I appreciate your honesty. I respect that. I'm not here to embarrass you in any way, but I would like to pray for you. Is there someone here to say, "Pastor, I'd like to find grace. I'd like to know that I'm going to heaven. I'd like to know that my sins are forgiven. I have eternal life, but I don't. Would you please pray for me because I want to raise your hand right now? Heads are bowed, eyes are closed. Anybody like that? Pray for me. All right. Thank you. Thank you. Anybody else with these? Say, "Pray for me."

Thank you. Put your hands down. Anybody else? I want to find God's grace in my life. I want to know that I'm going to heaven. Anybody else? Then I want there's couples here say pastor what you said tonight this morning touched my heart as a husband as a wife there's some things that I need to work on some lessons that I need to learn from Abraham and and Sarah from Noah and Mrs. Noah from Isaac and Rebecca. And and pastor, I'd like you to pray for me because God specifically talked to me about something in my marriage that I need to work on as a husband or as a wife. Would you pray for me? Raise your hand right now. Hold it for just a moment. God's challenged me as a husband, as a wife. Pray for me. All right. Thank you. Then I want others to say, "Pastor, would you pray for me?" Because uh I think the biggest challenge I've given you today is this as a Christian is letting go of the bitterness.