Kind

Turn your Bibles to 1 Corinthians chapter 13. 1 Corinthians chapter 13. We're going to continue our series on a melody of love. A melody of love. We're going to look at this passage where it gives us the 13 characteristics of what love really is. And if you look at 1 Corinthians chapter 13, beginning with verse number four, it says, "Charity, which is another word for love, suffereth long and is kind. Charity or love envyth not. Charity vaunted not itself, is not puffed up, did not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinkketh no evil, rejoices not iniquity, but rejoices in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeeth all things, endureth all things.

Charity or love never fails. But whether it be prophecies, they shall fail. Whether it be tongues, they shall cease. Whether it be knowledge, it shall vanish away. So, we want to learn about what is true love in the Bible. We've called this series a symphony of love because like with a symphony, all the instruments come together to create this great music, this great sound. And that's what you need is all 13 characteristics in your life. As part of this series, we're also going to give away a Hershey's Symphony candy bar. And this is extra creamy milk chocolate with almonds and toffee uh to anybody who memorizes 1 Corinthians 13:es 1-8.

If you memorize those and come quote them to me, uh then we will give you one of those candy bars and uh I I'd appre if you're able to memorize in the King James because that's the one I know. It makes it easier for me to see if you're right or not. But uh that you can get that candy bar as you go through the series and I know you'll get so much more out of the message by hiding God's word in your heart. Last week we looked at charity sufferth long. Love suffers long. And the idea of that word sufferth long, it comes from two Greek words macroia to burn long. And the illustrations we use with is one one of the illustrations those those candles that you know how you blow them out and they light back up and you blow them out and they light back up.

And that's what love should be is that when when somebody you care about when they come up uh and they do something sometimes it's like they they walk up to you and they go and they blow out that candle of love that that warm feeling inside you towards them. You know what I'm talking about? And it's just like they blew it out by their words, their actions, what they did or didn't do. And it's like they just went and blew that out. And the key is is for you to internally like that mad that candle on the cake is for you to let not let them control how you feel, but let God's love light it right back up again and not allow them to control you by their actions.

We also use it as the idea of to have a a long fuse. You know, uh sometimes people say, "Well, I have a short fuse, but I get over it quick." But you make a mess when you blow up all over the place as well. And uh to have a long fuse to burn long, not to blow up easily, not to get mad easily. As we talked about that, if you missed it, you can download it online and uh listen to that message. But today, we're going to talk about that that charity is kind. Love suffers long and is kind. And so when we talk about kind, what kind of song are we talking about? Because we're using the theme of music, symphony of love.

So what kind of song is kind? In Ephesians 4:es 30 through32, it says, "Engrave not the Holy Spirit of God, whereby you are sealed unto the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice. And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake had forgiven you." On Sunday nights, we have a club for the children called Patch the Pirate Club. And in that club, they earn badges and they memorize verses. And they also learn songs from the Patch the Pirate series. Now, it sounds like a strange name for a Christian club, but Patch the Pirate was a Christian musician who had gotten cancer in one of his eyes.

And instead of wearing a glass eye, he chose to wear a patch. And of course, was immediately nicknamed Patch the Pirate by all the kids at church. and he had had a burden to do something with good quality music for children. And and so he put together a series of ventures. I think there's about 50 adventures now. And everyone was a different theme to it. Uh learning about friendship, learning about family, learning about obeying the Lord and so on. And um and one of those one of those early on uh CDs back then it was CDs. And one of them there was a song based upon this verse. And and it went simply like this.

He says, uh, "And be ye kind to one another. Be tenderhearted, too. Be kind to one another in everything you do. Forgive." Thank you, Andy. Forgiving one another as Christ has forgiven. He messed me all up now. I don't know what to do with that boy. All right. But but the point is kindness is like that song to remember to be kind to one another. Notice it says be to be kind to one another tenderhearted. The word tenderhearted is a word which means with heart or passion to put feeling into it. You see don't be kind of kind. Don't be kind of kind. In other words, sometimes when our we're trying to be kind but we don't put our heart into it.

We don't put passion into it. And kindness has to come from the heart. It has to come with passion. And to do that, what we need to do is we need to ask God to give us a new song. In Psalms 40 and verse number three, it says, "You have to put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God. Many shall see it and fear and shall trust in the Lord." Now, you don't see music that comes out of somebody's mouth. But what you do see is the passion that they sing with. And we need to have a passion for kindness. In verse number 11 of Psalms 40, it says, "Withhold not thy tender mercies from me, oh Lord.

Let thy loving kindness and thy truth continually preserve me." And we want to ask God, God, help me to be the kind of person that's kind. Help me to have that that song that that that heart of of kindness. And that means to do that, you got to sing a different tune. God, I I need a new song. Because most of us naturally are not kind. We're not tender-hearted. And so, we're asking God to give us a new song. Um, turn over to second or sorry, 1 Peter chapter 3. 1 Peter chapter 3 and look at verses 8-2. 1 Peter chapter 3 and:es 8-2. 1 Peter chapter 3 beginning with verse number 8. He says, "Finally, be all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous, not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing, but contrarywise blessing, knowing that you are there to call that you should inherit a blessing.

For he that will love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile. Let him stew or spit out evil and do good. Let him keep seek peace and ensue it." You see though, it says to contrarywise and and kindness is when you act and don't react. See, normally what we do is when somebody does something, we react to them instead of acting in the way that God would have us to act. In in in Luke 6 and:es 31-38, I want you to turn over there with me again if you would. Luke chapter 6 and verses 31-38. Somebody once said it this way. Before you speak, think.

Before you speak, think. And if you look at the slide they're going to put up on the screen here, to think means to ask yourself, is it true? H is it helpful? I is it inspiring? N is it necessary. And K is it kind? In other words, the what how I'm going to respond to somebody, how I'm going to speak to them and act towards them. I need to stop and think because I need to do it contrary-wise. Normally, I'm going to act react instead of act. And when we react, it's usually the wrong thing. But when we stop and think, we can act in the kind way, in the right way. In Luke chapter 6 and beginning with verse number 31 down through verse number 38.

Luke 6:31. And as you would that men should do to you, do you also them likewise. For if you love them which love you, what thank have you? For sinners also love those that love them. And if you do good to them which do good to you, what thank have you? For sinners also do even the same. And if you lend to them of whom you hope to receive, what thank have you? For sinners also lend to sinners to receive as much again. But love ye your enemies and do good and lend hoping for nothing again. And your reward shall be great and you shall be the children of the highest. He is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.

Be therefore merciful as your father also is merciful. Teaching uh judge not and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, you shall not be condemned. Forgive and you shall be forgiven. Give and it shall be given unto you. Good measure pressed down and shaken together and running over shall men give into your bosom. For the same measure that you met with all it should be measured to you again. See what he's saying is don't give back in kind but to be kind is to give back in the right way. Uh so we need to be careful that we got to say God I need to do contrary contrary to what I feel what I think what my flesh wants to do.

God I need a new song. I need to respond in the right way. So I need to stop and think and not just give back in kind. See even the unsaved can be kind. Even the unsaved can be kind. In in Acts chapter 28:2, uh Paul said, "And the barbarous people showed us no little kindness, for they kindled fire and received us everyone because of the present rain, because of the cult." Paul was in a shipwreck, wrecked on a shore there, uh where there was people that weren't obviously barbers people. They weren't saved. And yet they showed kindness. See, anybody can show kindness. It takes a Christian to make it real.

See you instead of just doing a random act of love to do it a random evangelistic act of love to do it in the name of Christ. So what we need to learn is to how to start with words of kindness. In Proverbs 25 11 it says a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold and pictures of silver. In Proverbs 15:23 a man had joy by the answer of his mouth and a word spoken in due season how good it is. And and so kindness starts with our words. Uh saying the right thing, saying it right way, saying it with tender-heartedness, the the right words, and that starts with a song of praise. If we're going to learn a new song of kindness, we've got to start with the song of praise.

In Hebrews chapter 13 and verses 15 and 16, it says, "By him, therefore, let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually. That is the fruit of our lips giving thanks to his name. But to do good and to communicate, forget not for what such sacrifice God is well pleased. When I am praising God, that is going to help me to do good and to communicate in the right way. See, a problem so often is what happens is we respond back in in a negative way, respond back in a hurtful way instead of being kind. In Galatians 5:es 22- 23, it talks about the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness.

And the word gentleness there is the same Greek word for kindness. You see, uh longsuffering puts up with you. Kindness ask what can I do for you? You understand the difference? Longsuffering says, I am going to suffer long. There's times you have to suffer with people because they keep doing the same thing over and over again. You have to forgive them seven times and 70 times seven. And that's longsuffering. But kindness goes beyond that and says, not only am I going to suffer long with you and be patient with you, but what can I do for you? And so we need to cultivate the habit of kindness. Look at Galatians chapter 6.

Galatians chapter 6 and verses 7-10. Galatians chapter 6 and verses 7-10. He says, "Be not deceived. God is not mocked. For whatsoever a man seweth, that shall he also reap. For he that sweth to his flesh shall the flesh reap corruption, but he that seweth the spirit shall the spirit reap life everlasting." And let's not be weary in welloing, for in due season we shall reap if we faint not. As we have therefore opportunity, let's do good unto all men, especially unto them which are of the household of faith. Let's be kind to all men. A and kindness is a is a habit you have to cultivate. Not responding in kind, but to cultivate the habit of kindness.

In James chapter 5 and verse number 7, it says, "Be patient, therefore, brethren, unto the coming of the Lord. Behold, a husbandman, or another name for a farmer, waited for the precious fruit of the earth, and had long patience for it until he received the early and latter rain. See, a farmer doesn't just sit around waiting for the rain to come. He's out in the fields cultivating and and weeding and and pulling out the rocks and getting the fields ready with the seed. So, when the rain comes, it's ready for the rain. And and the same thing as kindness is a is something you have to cultivate in your life.

it it doesn't just happen. And so we need to cultivate an attitude of kindness. So the question is this, what kind of kind is kind? What kind of kind is kind? Go over to Colossians chapter 3. Colossians chapter 3 and look at verses 12-4. I'm sure most of you have seen the the Kind bars, right? Uh we got uh the the new kind of candy bar and it's all supposed to be healthy for you and everything and and and so uh and by the way on your way out today I've got one of these for you. You can get one as a reminder of the message today or maybe to give to somebody to show your kindness towards them. But you know what kind of kind is kind?

In Colossians chapter 3 and:es 12-4, Colossians chapter 3 and beginning with verse number 12, it says, "Put on therefore as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering, forbearing one another and forgiving one another. If any man have a quarrel against any, even so, as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. and above all these things put on charity which is the bond of perfectness. And so kindness, I want to try to help you understand what the word kindness means and what God is asking us to do in this in this category of love. And and the word kindness comes from a Greek word which means to be useful or helpful.

It means to be useful or helpful. Go over to James chapter 2. James chapter 2 and look at verses 15-1 17. James chapter 2 and verses 15-1 17. If a brother or sister be naked and destitute of daily food, and one of you say unto them, "Depart in peace, be warmed and filled, notwithstanding you give them not those things which are needful to the body." What does the profit? Even so faith that hath not works is dead being alone. Now kindness is words, but it's more than words. It's action. It's not, you know, these kind words to depart in peace and be warmed and filled. Those are kind words, but there's no action to those words.

Turn over to 1 John chapter 3. 1 John chapter 3 and look at verses 17 and 18. 1 John chapter 3 and verses 17 and 18. But whoso have this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? My little children, let's not love in word, neither in tongue, but in deed and in truth. So kindness is being useful. Kindness is what can I do to be a blessing, encouragement to you? In Proverbs 3:27, it says, "Withhold not good from them to whom it is due when it is in the power of thine hand to do it." So when you have that ability to be useful, that's kindness.

Now, let me give you some example of that. Let's say I come home and I'm in a bad mood. You ever done that? Don't raise your hand. All right? But I I come home and I'm a bad mood. Now, my wife has a choice when I come home that way. She can respond inkind. Well, if you're going to be grumpy with me, I'm going to be grumpy with you. Or she can respond with kind words. But what would be most useful in that situation? Let's say maybe to stop and say, "Well, why is he in a bad mood?" Maybe it's because he's hungry or hangry. You ever get in a bad mood when you're hungry? And so, what could my wife do that would be useful to me instead of responding back and kind and being grumpy back with you?

What could she do? Say, "Hey, you must be really hungry. Let's sit down and eat." Or maybe I'm tired. and she could say, "Why don't you lay down and take a rest for a while? Let me give you a back rub." See, that's what's being useful instead of coming back with hurting and cutting words. And even just to say something nice is great, but going beyond that and being useful. What can I do to be useful to you at this time? That's kindness. Let me give an example. number of years ago, I had a couple different church members at same about same time period that got upset with me because they felt like I wasn't spending enough time with towards them and their family.

One of them was going through a specific need and uh the other one just didn't feel like I was being there for them the way I should be as a pastor. And the one that had the specific need, first of all, I didn't know what was going on. He never told me what the problem was. Never talked to me about it. He he just assumed I should know. And so I didn't know what was going on. And uh instead of coming to me and say, "Pastor, uh something I feel like you're not paying enough attention to my family and we have a need right now." Instead of coming do that, what he did is he went out and started talking to other people in the church about it.

And he started complaining. The pastor never has enough time for us and and it became a problem in the church and it caused some issues in the church. But there was another guy that he was kind of feeling neglected and left out and and some issues in his life going on and and uh and he came to me and said, "Pastor, I I feel like you're not always there for me the way you need to be." And he asked me, you know, he's came and talked to me about it. And I sat down, talked to him. I said, "Listen, I I know that." He said, "Right now, um some things are going on at church that are keeping me absolutely swamped.

I don't have time that that I want to have to show to people. I'm I've been real busy. And on top of that is that time I was going through some debilitating headaches where I was just useless. Um I I was going through some really tough medical issues there. And uh he sat down, listened to me. You know what he did? He said, "Pastor, what can I do to help?" And he started coming in every week and said, "Let me help you out. What can I take off of your shoulders?" And he he started praying for me for my headaches. He was kind and useful because he said, "Here's a problem." And he said, "I want to understand what the problem is."

Instead of just complaining about it, I want to understand what the problem is and how we can resolve that issue. And he did it in kindness. And and folks, God wants us to be useful to one another. Look at Titus chapter 3. Titus chapter 3 and look at verses 4-6. Titus chapter 3 and verses 4-6. But after that the kindness and love of God our savior towards man appeared. Not by works of righteousness which we have done but according to his mercy he saved us by the washing of regeneration and renew of the Holy Ghost which he shed on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our savior. I I'm thankful for God's kindness towards us.

God showed his kindness. The Bible says in Romans chapter 5 and verse number eight, but God commendeth or showed his love towards us and that while we're yet sinners, Christ died for us. You see, kindness is not based upon what the other person deserves. It has nothing to do with that. Kindness is based upon our choices. And God showed his kindness towards us. Why are we sinners? And he did something useful. He sent his son to die for us. That's not based upon our goodness. In Ephesians 2:es 7-9, it says that the ages to come, we might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness towards us through Christ Jesus.

For by grace are you saved through faith and then not of yourselves. It is a gift of God, not of works any man should boast. You see, kindness is not deserved. that man didn't have I neglected him and I and and and and when he came to me I I apologized. I I was sorry for but I I neglected that need. I was getting so busy with other things. I was neglecting people in church and I needed to fix that. My his kindness towards me wasn't deserved. But he saw there was a need. He said, "How can I be useful towards you?" And God saw our need that we're sinners and without Christ, we're on our way to hell.

And in his kindness, he sent his son to die for us. In Romans chapter 2:4, it says, "Or despise thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering, not knowing that the kindness of God leadth thee to repentance." The goodness of God. You see, don't reject God's goodness. Don't reject God's kindness. His kindness says, "I want you to be saved. I want you to go to heaven. I want to you to have your sins forgiven. But you've got to receive and accept his kindness and his goodness. You've got to accept Jesus Christ as your savior." God in his kindness looked down at us sinners and said, "What can I do for them?

I'll send my son Jesus Christ." I'm thankful for his kindness. You know, our kindness to others can only come from God. In Ephesians chapter 2 and verse 10 verse verses 7-9, let me read it again. That in the ages to come, you might show the exceeding riches of his grace and his kindness towards us through Jesus Christ. For by grace are you saved through faith and that not of yourselves is a gift of God, not of works image boast. And then verse 10 says, "For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works which God had before ordained that we should walk in them. In myself, there's no kindness.

It's only in Christ. If I respond the way my flesh wants to respond, it's not going to be kind. But then I can respond the way God wants me to respond." Titus 3 and:8. This is a faithful saying. And these things I will that thou affirm constantly that they which have believed in God might be careful to maintain good works. These things are good and profitable unto men. So let me challenge you. When someone does something to hurt you, instead of just responding in kind, take a moment to think about the words you're going to use, take a moment to look beyond what's happening and say, "Why is this why is this going on?

What's going on in that person's life? What do they need from me?" And show the kindness of God. by being useful, by doing something to help that person in that situation. Proverbs 31. You ladies know that chapter. Most ladies don't like reading it because they feel so inadequate. The perfect woman, you know, but it's just God gives us a a a pattern to strive towards. And in Proverbs 31:26, it says this, "She openereeneth her mouth with wisdom, and in her tong tongue is the law of kindness." Did you know there's a law of kindness? Now, you cannot regulate kindness. There's no law that can force people to be kind.

You can't regulate that by the laws that we think of. When the Bible says the law of kindness, it's similar to the idea of the law of gravity. The law of gravity is not like a law that says you can't do this or you can't do that. The law of gravity is you jump off a building, you're going to hit the ground. And there's a law of kindness. And to follow that law, one of the things we need to do is put a limit on our tongue. In James 3:es 3 and 4, it says, "Behold, we put bits in the horse's mouth that they may obey us, and we turn about their whole body. Behold also the ships which thou which though they be so great are and are driven by fierce winds yet they turned about by a very small helm whether so the governor listeth.

But the Bible says your tongue needs to be controlled. That's part of the law of kindness. Kindness is especially about the words that you say. You ever heard somebody say something like this? If you don't have something nice to say, what's the normal answer? Don't say anything. Right? That's not the good answer. If you don't have something nice to say, say something nice anyway. That's kindness. It's the words we use. Don't just don't say anything. Especially don't say the bad thing, but find something nice to say. Let me ask you a question. Is your home a place where seldom is a discouraging word heard?

You know, in our relationships, we tend not to be very kind to one another. We stand then instead to respond back in kind. And God says, "No, contrarywise, give blessing for curse. Give kindness for hurt." So we need to learn to say the right words. Put your heart in gear before you engage your mouth. In Lukeap 6:45, "A good man out of the good treasure of heart bringeth forth that which is good, and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil. For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaketh." That's the law of kindness. It's what's in here that's going to come out here.

And we need to be kind. Go to Romans chapter 12. Romans chapter 12 and look at verse number 10. Romans chapter 12 and verse number 10. Be kindly affectionate one to another with brother love and honor preferring one another. Look at verse number 17. Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. If it be possible as much as lifeth in you, not the other person. Well, yeah. Nobody can live peacefully with that man. No, it's about you, not them. If it be possible as much life in you, live peacefully with all men. Dearly, beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath.

For it's written, vengeance is mine, sayeth the and I will pray repay, sayeth the Lord. Therefore, if thine enemy hunger, feed him. Be useful. If he thirst, give him to drink. For in so doing, thou shalt heap coals of fire in his head. Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good. You know how you start a fire? You don't take a big old log and light a match to it. What do you start fires with? What's it called? Kindling. Kindling. And that's what kindness is. Kindness is the kindling that builds relationships. Kindle a fire of kindness, not gossip. You see that one man, what he did is instead of coming to me when there was a problem and say, "Pastor, is there a problem here?"

and talking about it and allow us an opportunity to work it out. He immediately started going to other people at church saying, "Well, I, you know, a pastor doesn't have time for anybody anymore and a pastor this and a pastor that." And all those things begin to add up and started kindling started fires of gossip. It tells us in Proverbs 26 20 and 21, where no wood is, there the fire goeth out. So where there's no tail bearer, the the strife ceases. As coals are to burning coals and wood to fire, so is a contention man to kindle strife. So don't kindle strife in your relationships. Don't don't go around talking about, you know, we have a problem with our marriage.

What do we do? Go talk to all of our friends about how bad our husband, how bad our wife is. Instead of sitting down and working it out. have a problem with somebody, you talk about it behind their back instead of going to them directly with kindness and and kind words and trying to listen and say, "What can I do to be helpful to you in this situation? What is it that's going on in your life that I can understand and and work together with you on?" James 1 17 and 18 it says every good gift and every perfect gift from above and cometh down from the father's father of lights with whom there's no variableness neither shadow of turning of his own will begat us with the word of truth that we should be kind a kind of first fruits of his creatures you remember what the Bible tells us in Genesis that God again God said let in Genesis 1 11-12 and God said let the earth bring forth grass the herb yielding seed and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind after his kind.

And God said that was good. In my relationships, I find that a lot of times what I get is what's reflecting from back from me. You see, after is kind. And if I am controlled by Christ, what's going to come out of me is Christ and his kindness. And I'll find more and more I'll get that reflected back to me as well. Ephesians 2:7 that in the ages to come he might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness towards us through Christ Jesus. I'm so thankful for the kindness of God. He loved me when I did not deserve it. And not only did he love me, but he said something so useful. He said, "You need a savior and sent his son to die for me."

And that's what love is. Love is not responding back in kind. Love is not reacting, but it's acting. It's thinking before I speak to make sure what comes out of my mouth comes from my heart and not from my flesh, but it's also being useful. How can I help you? How can I better understand you? And by better understanding why you're doing what you're doing that makes me so upset, then I can say now, how can I help in this situation? I was so thankful for that man. He helped me so much during a very difficult time in my life. I'll tell you folks, that was a time where I was considering resigning as a pastor.

That was a time in my life where I was just in pain. It was a time in my life where I just didn't have I couldn't concentrate and do everything I needed to do. And I knew I was missing and not doing. And that's why I was going to resign because I felt like I was not being the pastor to that church at that time that they needed. And that man came to me and kind words. He said, "Pastor, I feel like you've neglected our family. I feel like you're not there for us." He says, "There's something going on in your life." And I broke down. and he listened. And that was one of the kindest men I've ever known because he came to me.

He prayed for me every day. When he see me, put his arm around me, say, "How you feeling today, pastor?" He'd come in to my office to say, "What can I do for you today that will help you?" and he got me through because he was kind. And how many times we do exactly opposite of that and we make the situation worse cuz that other man he caused a lot of problems in the church. fed a lot of kindling of gossip to other people and they began to well if he's this way towards them what about well maybe this and they it started coming up all kinds of things that weren't even true now anymore but they just added fuel to fire you have to make a choice going to close with Philippians chapter 1:es 9-11 it

says in this I pray that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in all judgment that you may prove things are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ, being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ on the glory and praise of God. Folks, don't just be kind of like kind. Be kind. Be filled with the praise and the glory of God. When we're praising God for his kindness, it is so much easier to be kind to others around us. And kindness is the words we say, words that come from the heart with tender-hearted, with passion and caring. And kindness is the hands. Because that's what that word kindness comes from. It comes word means hands. I'm reaching out with my hands to give you something that's going to be useful to you. Let's bow our prayer.