Unseemly

close to what is it said back in 1st Samuel 23 where Jonathan strengthened his hand in God at one point in his life he needed Jonathan to come along and say let's move up that triangle together closer to God and but when Jonathan was not there I believe because of what Jonathan had done for him in chapter 23 David was able to do it for himself later on in chapter 30 and strengthen his own hand in God and and so love often times is like a triangle realizing in my relationship with that person My job in that relationship is to draw that person closer to God through love. But love can also take other forms as well.

And that's the strength. It can be a circle. A a circle. Turn over to your Bibles to 1 John chapter 4. 1 John chapter 4 and look at verse number 7. 1 John chapter 4 beginning with verse number 7. 1 John chapter 4. I got to move that out of my light there. All right. 1 John chapter 4 and beginning with verse number 7 says, "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God, and everyone that loveth is born of God and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God, for God is love." Skip down to verse number 21. And this commandment have we from him, that he who loveth God love his brother also.

You see, love takes the form of a circle. In other words, the more I love God, the more I'm going to love you. and the more I love you, the more I'm going to love God. And it's this never ending circle in our lives as we learn to love God more and more and more. A and so we have this circle of love as the more we draw upon the love of God, the more we can love others as well. Now, God's love comes in the shape of a cross. In John 3:1 16, the Bible says, "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son." Look at 1 John chapter 4. Look at verse number nine. And this was manifested the love of God towards us because that God sent his only begotten son into the world that he might live through that we might live through him here in his love not that we love God but that he loved us and sent his son to be a propitiation for our sins.

Look at verse number 15. Whosoever shall confess that Jesus is son of God, God dwelleth in him and he in God. You see, God's love takes the form of a cross. And on that cross, Jesus died out of love for you, out of love for me, to save us from our sins. And that's the shape of God's love. He loved us when we were sinners. He loved us when we did not deserve it. Romans 3:23, for all have sinned and come short of the glory of God. And and God commends his love towards who are yet sinners, Christ died for us. You see, it's easy for you and I to love somebody who loves us. But God loved us when we didn't deserve it.

And he loved us so mo much he sent his love in the shape of the cross where his son died. See the shape that will not fit that hole inside of you is the shape of your religion or the shape of your rituals or shape of your righteousness. You ever watch little kids with one of these things and they've got the wrong shape and they're trying to fit the wrong shape into a a certain place and it just won't fit. And so here they have like a a triangle and they're trying to put it in the cross and it won't fit in there. Well, that's what happens when you try to fit your religion or your rituals or your own righteousness.

God says in Ephesians chapter 2:es 8 and 9, "For by grace are you saved through faith." Then not of yourselves. It's the gift of God, not of works, less man should boast. And see, there's a hole inside of you, and that hole is where God belongs. But there's only one way you can fill that hole, and that is through the cross. And when you put the cross in, that fills the hole of what's missing in your life. It's not religion. It's not your rituals. It's not your own righteousness, but it's Jesus Christ. In Romans 10:es 9 and 10, it says that if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in thine heart that God's raised from the dead, thou shalt be saved.

For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. Verse number 13, for whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. And today, if you want to fill that hole in your heart, that is God. And the only way you can fill that empty hole where God belongs is by putting God in there. And the only way you can receive God into your life is through Jesus Christ, what he did for you on the cross and through his death, his burial, his resurrection. And you need to call upon him and ask him, "Lord, please fill that hole in my life. Please fill that emptiness in my life.

Take away my sin and give me eternal life. You need to call upon the name of the Lord. Love also takes the form of the mind, your brain. In Philippians chapter 2 and:es 3-5, it says, "Fulfill you my joy that you be like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through strife or vain glory, but in loneliness of mind, let each seem other better than themselves. Look, not every man in his own things, but every man also on the things of others. Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus. God says, listen, if you're going to love the way I want you to love, then you've got to find that in your mind.

You've got to make a choice. I'm going to love that person. You see, you love them no matter what. Not through strife or vain glory. That's not love. But you resolve those differences. You work them out. You come together to be like-minded. And it's only through the mind of Christ that we can do that. In Philippians chapter 4 and verse two, there was a couple of ladies in the church that were having a conflict and and Paul wrote this. I beseech yodius and I beseech that they be of the same mind in the Lord. Because what's going to happen is we are going to as human beings, we're going to have conflicts.

We're going to have differences. We're going to have misunderstandings. We're going to have problems. But we've got to choose in our mind. I'm not going to have strife and glor. I'm not going to have strife in in my relationships with others. I'm going to have the glory of God's love. I'm going to choose in my brain to love them and try to be like-minded to find what we have common in Jesus Christ to find what we have common through God's word to find what we have common through God himself. So love takes many different shapes in our lives. So let me ask you a question. What kind of love are you shaping in your relationships?

What kind of love are you shaping in your relationships? In 1 Thessalonians 4:es 9 and 10, it says, "But as touching brotherly love, you need not that I write unto you, for you yourselves are taught of God to love one another, and indeed you do it toward all the brethren which in all Macedonia, but we beseech you, brethren, that you increase more and more." Love is something you have to keep working at. It's something you have to keep shaping every day, every week, every month, every year. Whether it's in your marriage, my wife and I, we'll be married 48 years this March 25th. And and all those years we've had to many times reshape our love.

Sometimes because of circumstances, because our situation changed, you know, we had kids and that reshaped our love relationship. And then then the kids became teenagers and that reshaped your love relationship. And then they all left home and that reshapes your love relationship. And you've got to constantly be re reshaping it and working it. And the same thing is true in so many other relationships as well, your friendships, people in church, because it's never it's never a stagnant thing. Love has to be a constantly reshaping and reforming in our relationship one with another. Our love has to be molded, but it has to be molded into the image of Christ.

In Romans 8 29, for whom he did forno, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his son that he might be the firstborn among many brethren. See, God said he wants us to be molded or conformed into his image. And what's the image of Christ? Christ loved us while we were sinners. Christ loved us unconditionally. Christ loved us sacrificially. Christ was our servant. That's the kind of love that I need to mold towards others. See, so often our love is conditional. So often our love is based upon what the other person is going to do. But God loved us without condition. And that's the kind of love that he wants us to mold in our lives as well.

You know, we need to be Here's another thing you might remember from years ago. Everybody remember silly putty? How many remember silly putty? you know, that's I don't know if it's still around or not, but you know, I got silly putty and you take it out and you can mold it and shape it in all kinds of different ways and and all of that and and we need to be like silly putty in God's hands cuz God wants to form us and make us in his image. In Isaiah 45 and verse number n the Bible says, "Woe unto him that striveth with his maker. Let the potsh strive with the pot shirts of the earth shall the clay uh say to him that fashionth what why make what makest thou or thy work he hath no hands?

Yeah. How can the pot is being formed by the potter? How can it say you're not shaping me right? You're not doing this right? You see we have to allow God to shape our lives. You know you know what the biggest problem with love is? There's a lot of silly ideas out there about love. You you you you you follow love on the internet. That's not God's love. You watch on TV, that's not real love. You see, we got all these silly ideas in our head about love, and we need to stop having a silly ideas, but be putty in God's hands. We need to get on our knees and say, "God, help me to love this person because they're not real lovable right now.

God, help me to love this person more. Help me to change in in my attitude towards them. Help me to be different." You see, we got to be putty in God's hand. Let him form the love in our life. Go to 1 Corinthians chapter 12. 1 Corinthians chapter 12. 1 Corinthians chapter 12. And look at verse number 19. If they were all one member, where were our the body? But now are they many members yet but one body. But the eye cannot see say the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee. Nor they give the head to the feet, I have no need of you. Nay, much more these members of the body which seem to be more feeble are necessary.

And these members of the body which we think to be less honorable, upon these we bestow more abundant honor, and our uncumbly parts of more abundant comeliness. For our comely parts have no need. But God hath tempered the body together, having given more abundant honor to that the the parts of the body which lacked, that there should be no sism in the body, but that the members should have the same care one for another. And whether one men suffer, one member suffer, all the members suffer with it. Or one member be honored, all the members rejoice with it. Now ye are the body of Christ and members in particular.

See, so often we begin looking everybody else, well, they're not like me, but the hand is not like the foot. And the foot is not like the eyes or the ears. There's many members in the body and all are necessary. And so often what we have is we have this schism because we're expecting people to be like me and they're not. And every member of the body is is shaped differently by God and they have a different personality and different talents and gifts and and and different ways of doing things. And that's okay. And we need to find out how to come together in the body and fit every piece in a place where it needs to be.

And that's that's the challenge that we have is fitting the parts together in the way that they should. Bible says, "Let love not be unseemly." You know, something has a seam in it, that's a weak point. Go over to Matthew chapter 22 if you would with me, please. Matthew chapter 22. What we want to do is we want to try to seam together to put our lives together with seamlessly. In Matthew chap 22 and beginning with verse number 37. It says Jesus said unto them, thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy soul, with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. The second is like unto it.

Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. So God says, "Listen, we've got to learn how to love one another and and and to do that seamlessly." And here's the things, folks. To love, you cannot do what seems right in your own heart and mind. We're sinners. The heart is deceitful and wicked above all things. And I and I in Judges 21:2, it says, "In those days, there was no king in Israel. Every man did that which was right in his own eyes. In Proverbs 14:12, there's a way which seemth right unto a man, but the end there of the ways of death.

And I hope one of the things you'll learn through this series that we're doing in 1 Corinthians 13 is that a lot of things that seem right to us are not right. It's one of the big problems in marriage. A lot of men will love their wives the way they would love a man that they want to be loved. And it may seem right to them, but it's not right because that's not how she needs to be loved. And vice versa. And so often we're doing what seems right to us instead of what is right according to the word of God. And then go over to Luke chapter 6 if you would please. The other thing I want to challenge you is don't treat me as you see me.

Treat me as you see me for what God could do in my life. in Luke chapter 6 and beginning with verse number 31. Luke chapter 6 beginning with verse number 31 and it says, "And as you would that men should do to you, do you also to them likewise? For if you love them which love you, what thank have you? For sinners also love those that love them. And if you do good to them which do good to you, what thank you. For sinners also do even the same. And if you lend to them to whom you hope to receive, what thank you. For sinners also lend to sinners receive as much again. But love ye your enemies and do good and lend hoping for nothing again and your reward shall be great and you shall be the children of the highest for he's kind unto the unthankful unto the evil.

Be therefore merciful as your father also is merciful. You see what he's saying here is this is don't don't love people as you see them as they are. See what they could be if you showed them the love of Christ. see that person if I were to love them the way that God wants me to love them. If I would love them with the with Christ's sacrificial servant love, how would that change them and see them as they possibly could be rather than these are? You ever remember even fairy tales to your kids when they were little? You remember the one of the frog prince? Remember how the wicked witch turned the frog the prince into an ugly frog and the only thing would turn it back into a handsome prince was a kiss of a beautiful princess?

You know the princess that finally kissed that frog. She had to look beyond the frog and see what he could be. And sometimes with people, you have to look beyond that person and not see them as they are, but say, "Wow, if somebody would just love them with God's love, if they could just have God's love in their life, I see what they could be, and I want to be used by God to love that person, to help them to be that person." Love is behave itself not unseemly. The word means without shape or void. And love takes many different shapes. But the word also it carries the idea of having manners. Having good manners.

Look at 1 Corinthians chap 10. 1 Corinthians chap 10 and look at verses 31-33. 1 Corinthians 10:es 31-33. Where whether therefore you eat or drink or what you do, do all to the glory of God, giving none offense, neither the Jews, nor the Gentiles, nor the church of God, even as I please all men in all things, not seeking my own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be saved. You know, to have good manners. Good manners is kind of an arbitrary thing, isn't it? You ever sat down at a table and you got, you know, a half a dozen forks on one side of the table and you got all these nice and you're not sure which one to use.

with good manner says you have to use this fork for this part of your meal and that fork for that part of the meal. I'm not talking about that kind of stuff. How many have ever heard of a book called All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten. Anybody ever heard that book? Yeah, that was a good book and I I I would recommend reading it. But, you know, one of the things that I think is true is is a lot we need to know is learned in kindergarten, including good manners. This is a chart from a kindergarten classroom for good manners. Be kind. Use polite words. Listen carefully. Think first.

Be honest. Take turns. Respect everyone. Help others. Do your best. Is that not a good chart to live by? That's that's good manners. I'm not talking about holding your little pinky up when you take a cup of tea. I'm talking about just being kind and nice. And the Bible says the love does not behave itself unseemly. It means we have good manners towards as we treat other people. We treat them with good manners. In 1 Peter 2:12, it says, "Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles." The word conversation, by the way, it means how your life speaks. You ever heard the statement, "His walk talks more than talk talks."

How your life speaks. Having a good conversation or living a good life of honest among the Gentiles, that whereas they speak against you as evildoers, they may by your good works, which they shall behold glorify God in the day of visitation. in Acts chapter 24:1 16 and here unto do I exercise myself to have always a good conscience void of offense towards God and towards men. You see I I want to live my life in a way that treats other people with respect and kindness that hows good manners in how I treat them to behave wisely. In 1st Samuel 8 verse 18:14 it says and David bea behaved himself wisely in all his ways and the Lord was with him just behaving wisely stop and think before you do

stop and think before you speak in 1 Timothy 3:15 it says but if I tar long that thou mayest know how thou oughtest behave thyself in the house of God which is the church of the living God the pillar in the ground of truth you know where a lot of our conflicts come right here right in church with other church members. But God says, "Listen, you got to behave in church. You got to behave in a way that shows love towards one another." In Psalms 101, verse number two, it says, "I will behave myself wisely in a perfect way. Oh, when wilt thou come unto me? I will walk within my house with a perfect heart."

You know where the real test of character is? when you're alone, when you're with your family. A lot of times we treat our family one way and we treat strangers another way. You ever been at home yelling at your wife or yelling at your kids and the phone rings and you're going, "Hey, hello." It's unsemly. It'll be seamless between the two. And the real test of character, your love is how you treat people even when nobody else is around. If you want to have good manners, get the book. Now, the book I'm talking about is not Emily Post book on good etiquette. Okay, that's that can be helpful. But in Romans 12:1 and2, the Bible says, "I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto him, which is your reasonable service, and be not conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you improve that good and acceptable and perfect will of God."

We got to start thinking differently. And the way to think differently is from the word of God. What does God say about my relationships? You see, that's what we have to put into practice. Good manners, just treating people with kindness and respect, with love, and just treating them right. That's the way to love others. But there's one more thing this word can mean. In Romans chapter 1 and verse 27, it uses the same word. It says, "And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another, men with men, working that which is unseammly, and receiving themselves the recompense of their error, which was meat."

So the word unseemly carries a connotation of of immorality of of treating people sexually in the wrong way. And as Christians, love should behave itself unseemly. It's having good moral standards. Let me ask you a question. Since when was having moral standards started be started being considered old-fashioned? It's not. The Bible says in 1 Peter chapter 3 and verse 5, "For after this manner in the old time, the holy woman also who trusted in God adorned themselves being of subjection unto their own husbands." These older women, they would dress in a way that was modest. They would live in a way that was modest.

They respected those around them and and did not behave unseemly. And I believe what and the Bible teaches this in in 1 Timothy chapter 2, we don't have time to turn there, but talks about standards of dress. In Ephesians 4 22 and chapter 5:es 3 and 4, it talks about having standards of conversation, words, the bad words not coming out of your mouth. And in in Ephesians 4:es 19- 24, it talks about standards of action. See, what I'm afraid is one of the reasons we've lost what love is truly about is because we we got this idea that that we don't have to have standards anymore. We don't have to have morality anymore.

And it's okay to talk in certain ways. It's okay to act in certain ways. And it's not not unseemly. You know what the problem was with us in America today and the Christians today is we've forgotten how to blush. In Jeremiah 6 and verse1 15 it says, "Were they ashamed when they had committed abomination? Nay, they were not at all ashamed. Neither could they blush. Therefore, they shall fall among them that fall. At the time that I visit them, they shall be cast down, sayeth the Lord. We live in a society today where we don't blush anymore. Something comes on TV that's immoral and we just kind of watch it and laugh and go on.

We're going through the internet and there's a real and we just watch the real. Somebody tells a dirty joke and we just stand there and listen. We don't seem to have moral standards anymore. And one of the ways we show love, one of the ways my wife shows love for me is dressed in a way that she's not advertising herself to every other man in the world. One of the ways I show love towards her is I'm not out there talking, you know, two-sided jokes and and making innuettos to other women. One of the ways we show love towards another, we don't we don't look at these things. We don't listen. We don't go there because that's not what love is.

Love does not behave itself unseemly. Love needs to major on the minors and minor on the majors. In Luke 11:42 it says, "Boe unto you Pharisees for you tithe mint and rue and all manner of herb. These in the love of go these you and Passover judgment and the love of God. these ought you have done and not to leave the other undone. See manners love minors on the ma minors and majors on the majors. So often we're so focused on this little thing that doesn't really matter. We don't focus on the things that do matter in our relationships. And there's three things that do matter in love. And the first one is your soul.

In Matthew 16:26, for what is a man profit if he should gain the whole world and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? Your soul matters. And you need to realize that there's an emptiness inside of you if you don't have Christ that only the cross can fill. And you need to find him as your savior. But as Christians, we understand the importance of our soul, our relationship with God because it starts with our love for him. And that's where we find our love for others. In Matthew 10:37, it says, "He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me. And he that loveth son or daughter more than me, he's not worthy of me."

If we're not loving God first, we're not really loving others the way we ought to. And the only way to really love your spouse or love your children, love your parents, love the people around you is loving God. Great peace have they which love thy law and nothing shall offend them. And when I am offended by somebody and when I'm not loving somebody, the first place I need to look is not, well, look what they did. Look what they said. Look what No, it's to God and say, God, I need to love you more. I need to love you more because if I'm loving you, I should not be offended. If I'm loving you, I should not be not loving this person.

I understand it's not easy and and then you're asking God to help you to love them. And there's a lot of process we go through, but understanding that that love comes from our savior. In 1 Peter chapter 4:8, it says, "Above all things, have perfect charity or love among yourselves, for charity or love shall cover the multitude of sins." It also says, "Use hospitality one to another without grudging." In other words, loving others. Love covers the multitude of sins. Love says, "I'm not going to focus on what's wrong. I'm going to focus on what's right." Now, that doesn't mean we ignore what's wrong, but we minor on the minor and major on the majors.

And it's taking that time to really love others and and to see them with that love of God. And like I said earlier, not to see them as they are, but to see them as they could be if they really had the love of God work in their lives. And you know how God loves people? Through you and through me. So if I love them more, that's going to help them to love God more and change. James 1 26 says, "If any man among you seemth to be religious, love does not behave itself unseemly." So if you seem to be religious, then you're to be loving others as God loves you. Let's bow in prayer. Every head bowed, every eye closed.

What about you this morning? Would God speak to you through this message? Love takes many different shapes. Maybe it's your heart or your emotions. Don't love people based upon how you feel. Love people based upon what you're going to do. Because love does. That comes from the heart. Feelings come and go. Feelings are not reliable, but choices are. And you can choose to love. And you need to love as God has loved us. See, love needs to be a well-rounded square having all parts to it. Love is like a triangle that as we draw closer to God, we can draw others closer to us and closer to him. We can draw closer to God together in our relationship and building that right kind of relationship. And love is like a circle. The more I love God, the more I'm going love others. The more I love others, the more I'm loving God. That continuous circle. But most importantly, love is like the